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  • Writer's picture Peter Kupisz

"I Still Cannot Help but Doubt my Atheism"

Many atheists acknowledge that from their perspective, there is no purpose to life. Despite this depressing fact, they often try to take a positive approach by pointing out that they can still create purpose and thereby make their lives feel meaningful. For many atheists, this approach works and they simply ignore the incongruence between their lives and objective reality. However, if a loving God exists, it’s plausible to think he would create us with an inward sense of objective purpose; a purpose found in the reason for which he created us. This inward sense of “something bigger” is exactly what one atheist describes in his life.

…I had become a kind of proselytizing atheist who would take any opportunity to tell a religious person that they were wrong; the idea of a higher power working in my life or anyone else’s for that matter, simply was not on the table… I would often sit and intentionally reflect on the universe, staring at the stars, and trying to fathom how big the cosmos was and how small I was, in comparison. And I would tell myself, isn’t it incredible that all of this happened by accident? That by some chance, I’m alive and existing?… I still cannot help but doubt my atheism. I can’t help seeing the world through a focal point of purpose; that my life has meaning, not because I say it does but because something bigger than myself might be behind it.

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Mouthy Buddha, "Is Sam Harris Losing His Audience To Jordan Peterson?" May 27, 2018. YouTube video, 10:17,

Timestamp: 2:35 – 2:49; 3:23 – 3:45; 9:02 – 9:17



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